I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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