So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Randomize
