She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
