Having a random hookup so left but love u
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Randomize
