This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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