i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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