saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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