If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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