I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
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I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
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And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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