yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.
Aren't divorce parties fun?
You and I have very different definitions of fun.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
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