she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
