She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I can't put those talents on a resume
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
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