butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
