Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
