Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize