i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
So many bounce houses so little time
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
What a dumb baby whore.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize
