Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
A+ Viking dick
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize