Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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