How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
