i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
he just fucked me for my cheese..
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize