Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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