I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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