TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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