how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
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