Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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