Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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