Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
