We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
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