i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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