Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
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