idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
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