oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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