Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize
