he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Randomize
