sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Buhtt sex?
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
