Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
