lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
He better not be in your backpack
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Randomize
