How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
