I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
