I wish i was in the wii world.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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