Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
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