Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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