remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
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