would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
