Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Randomize
