Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize