I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
This show inspires me to have sex in space
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Randomize
