She said her name was "party"
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
