He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
