I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
