come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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